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BangBoomCrashPOW – #31
Yes, I'll have the Cowboy double cheeseburger...and I believe the lady will have POW 31!
Yippee! The POW is back! Yeah, we kinda took a break (act like you noticed) from this little weekly exercise in textual comedy. We had a lot going on here in the POW department of BangBoomCrash HQ (Mikes couch). Firstly, was the ton of snow that we got over here on the east (better) coast. What a crapfest that was! Four or something feet of snow over two weeks? Really?
Secondly was the new server upgrade that our IT department (Stefan’s cousin LJ) set up. We replaced the original web server (1999 Compaq Presario/Windows 98) with a brand new (found on big trash day) web server (2002ish Dell XPS/Windows XP Pro - not braggin'...just sayin'). So, everything has been re-setup on the new hardware and seems like it's running awesome except the spell check keeps confusing random words and auto-correcting them before we can breadsticks carpet house.
But whatever, doesn't matter! The important thing is that we're back in business (grown men filming silly videos). So, let's get into the funny with this new POW before I hit the 942 character lim
BangBoomCrash – The Trailer
Hey Everyone,
Shane Zimmerman hooked us up with a killer audio track and we whipped up this video. You may recognize his work in our other skits like Atlantic City or our awesome new video intros. Let us know what you think. BETTER YET, why don't you share it with anyone or everyone that you know? You can press the "share" button in the top left corner of the video player while it's playing to copy the URL and then paste it in your Facebook or whatever you use and let everyone know how awesome we are. I'm sure all your friends would apprecaite it...I know we would. Thanks in advance. Check back for more soon.
Scientific Extras
Apparently, Antarctica decided to visit York, PA and MAN, she's a bitch with a ton of baggage (the baggage being about three feet of snow.) I think she's trying to move in or something...because I saw all these feminine products in my medicine cabinet, most of which are not mine. Also, the house smells like potpourri and usually it smells like Sam Adams Boston Lager, Double Cheese Burgers and old socks...GOD I hate her so much. She's such a...(sigh)... never mind.
Anyway, since she showed up and pretty much took over, Mike and I were unable to film this week - so there's no new skits to post. Luckily, I found some time to whip up two videos with the left over footage from Science Experiment 2 to keep you entertained. It was either this or film a skit where I'm hanging out and talking to a snow man instead of han...wait, that actually sounds pretty funny - I'm gonna write that down, brb.
Ok, I'm back.
Anyway, the first one is the original ending to Science Experiment 2. I made this mainly because Tom threatened to sue us once he found out he was cut from the final version of Science Experiment 2. He was all like "well my lawyer and agent said Blah Blah Blah", and we were all "Ok Tom, we get it...your mom's an agent and a lawyer". He's always rubbing that in our face...
The 2nd video I made is a blooper reel for Science Fiction 2. Check it out here, or not...whatever, I don't care. Antarctica has me in such a foul mood and I'm pretty much giv....oh sh*t, she's coming, gotta go...later!
BangBoomCrashPOW – #30
"Hey, office dog! C'mon boy! C'mon office dog!"
That's what you'd be saying if you had an office dog! I'm talking about a dog that is allowed to hang out at your office. Like, it lives there. Like, it was bought and brought to the office for the sole purpose of being the office dog. You could put your company's name on a little dog shirt and put it on him and he'd just hang out and walk around all day, but that’s just a suggestion.
It'd boost morale like nothing else. Imagine - you'd get off of a long call with your boss that basically called you an idiot for 34 minutes for something that you now realize was a bad idea - you know what you could go do after the call? Hang out with office dog, man! You could go give him a biscuit and shake his paw, too! You could even take him for walks on your lunch hour!
AND it's your lucky day because I have a perfectly good office dog right here, ready to go - and it can be yours for FREE!!
So, hurry up because this offer won't last long and I have to get this Doberman out of the janitorial closet by Monday because management here is flipping out on me for...something unrelated.
Not because of the stray dog I brought to the office...
...it's because it has rabies.
ACT NOW!
BangBoomCrashPOW – #29
In-laws.
How many times have you heard 'ugh! I hate my in-laws' from your friends, family, co-workers of both the male and female genders? Every day? Sure, why not? Hating your in-laws is kind of an expected part of marriage. It's kind of anticipated that when you get married you're not going to like your in-laws.
But not me.
My in-laws are awesome. They're great, really. I kind of feel bad for my friends with the typically annoying in-laws. Ya know, the kind of in-laws that thousands of comedians have complained about for years. I actually have it so good with my in-laws that when I'm over visiting them I create drama with my imagination, just to kind of relate to those who don't have the cool kind of in-laws I do.
One of the funnest things I do though, to create that imaginary drama, is that whenever my in-laws yell at the family dog I like to pretend in my head that they are saying it to me. A couple things from just the other night went like this:
NO! NO! NO! DON'T EAT THAT!
The stupid dog got up on the counter and ate the taco dip. Stupid dog.
UGH! God, you stink!
That stupid dog was out in the rain and came back in smelling like a wet…dog.
GO AWAY!
The stupid dog would not leave us alone when we were eating! Stupid dog.
YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR OUR DAUGHTER!
The dog was actually being OK when they said this one, but ya know. Stupid dog.
BangBoomCrashPOW – #28
Man.
I hit a car today. Like...smashed it.
I smashed a car today.
Man. It just really sucks - here's what happened:
I went out to dinner last night for a friends birthday, lets call her 'kt'. Now, 'kt' lives about 45 minutes to an hour away from where I live, lets call it my 'house'. So, I leave my 'house' to go to the party for 'kt'. It was a great time, really fun. I actually sat in between my wife and Stefan, but that's irrelevant.
It turned out to be a way longer night than I expected. We've all been there, ya know. Sitting there at a dinner, with some of your best friends, drinking and looking crazy awesome in your new button down polo.
But whatever.
Anyway, like I said it was a fun night and we ended up staying until about 1:40 in the A.M, so by the time I got to bed it was about 3:45. I had to get up for work at 6, so I only got 2 hours of sleep.
So at about 6:45 in the A.M. I'm heading to work down a one way street, I kinda look away for a second and...
BAM!
I hit a parked car. Smashed it.
So, of course tons of thoughts went through my head - all I could think was 'my insurance is gonna skyrocket' - don't get me wrong though I also thought about the persons' car that I hit, ya know? I was thinking 'this dudes gonna come out to see his car smashed today', 'this guys gonna have to figure out how to get to work for awhile, maybe weeks', but most of all I felt bad because 'this dudes not even gonna know who did it'.
Anyway, my Hummer got scratched and grape Tab was sold out in the soda machine at work. So...yeah, pretty crappy day.
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